Lots of Love

This little girl loves her Daddy.

Not much is sweeter than feeling those little arms around your neck giving you a big squeeze.

Nora reading to Josie in the courtyard.

Some moments just make your heart melt.

Easter Picnic

We had a blustery day here as we celebrated Resurrection Sunday, one of the highlights of our year (you can read some of Mitch's reflections on what Easter means to us here).


The weather seemed to match my mood on this day as it oscillated between dark clouds, snow, and blustery, warm sunshine. The fullness of what it means to me to be human, feeling all the emotions of living daily life on this planet. The joy and hope of Christ's resurrection defining how we seek to live our lives today. The reality of a husband finally getting home at 4:30 in the morning, swamped with work, exhausted, stressed. Three precious, sweet girls with bright, expectant eyes, trusting, loving, knowing, laughing, living in the present moment of this beautiful life we have. Me, taking it all in, struggling to let go of the things I cannot control, feeling the depth of my thankfulness for all that I have been given, loving the now and hating the now, knowing that now is all I have and yet living in the knowledge and hope of what is yet to come, remaining connected and in love with every member of my family. Daily life.


After church our friends the Cuthbertsons came over and we celebrated Resurrection Sunday with them, laughing, feasting, soaking up sunshine, loving on little girls, watching the antics of big kids flying in the wind and making kites, celebrating as one big family.


Ruthie in her Easter outfit playing with an Easter egg:

Josie wanted to show you her egg:

Anna working hard to peel hers:

Does she seem bigger to you? All grown up and cute as a button:

Nora and Ruthie, forever friends:

Josie and Nora running in the wind. These two are a good match for each other:



The colorful picnic spread:


The younger generation served their plates first and found a spot on the picnic blankets:

Then we joined them:

Here's wishing your Easter, too, was full of real life, good times with friends, smiles and laughter, sunshine and not too many dark clouds that keep us grounded in our own humanity.

Josie turns...

three!!!

Josie, my sweet three year old little girl. I hope you felt celebrated and loved on your birthday. I hope you know how special you are. One of a kind. Spunky and caring, feisty and independent, thoughtful and sincere, daring and adventurous, social and with a smile that lights up any room you are in.
Three years ago you entered into this world, into my arms, into my care. My world will never be the same again. What a responsibility, to nurture your spirit, guide you into what is right, encourage your individuality, show you each and every day that you are loved for exactly who you are. What a joy to be the recipient of your smiles and your hugs, your joy and your laughter, your trust, your serious dialogues, your thoughtful, caring actions.
Thank you for being you.


Here's a little video Grandma Jo took from Josie's birthday party of everybody singing 'Happy Birthday' and then Josie blowing out her candles.

We had a lot of fun celebrating you, Josie! Music and instuments, charades, a scavenger hunt to find the cupcakes, good times with good neighbors, lots of laughter and energy and fun had by all.

My Favorite Corner of the House

It's not really a corner, it's a wall. These last two weeks have been tough. It was one of those times when you feel unable to get on top of anything, life gets you down, emotional tensions run high in all directions, you are kept busy with sick kiddos all day, all week, it seems impossible to keep your house clutter free and feeling peaceful. I was feeling pretty low and stressed to the max in all directions.

And my friend Michelle made me this banner:

"love lives here"

Our reminder, even in the tough times, of what it is that keeps us going, of the good that we do have, of so much to be thankful for.

I was inspired to create my own artwork that symbolized our family to grace our wall: And then I cleared that wall of everything else, so these reminders stand out to us of who we are and what we have.

Even if I have been unable to keep the floors or counters or desktops cleared of 'stuff' in the craziness that is our lives, there is a simple space in my home that reminds me of the peace and grace and love that lives here. My favorite corner of the house.

Sweet Sister Spirit

With three of the four girls in this household feeling under the weather today, Anna voluntarily became our nurse. She was amazing, bringing us water, puke buckets, washcloths, Becky blankets, dolls, instruments, making cozy spots for us to lie down in, taking care of Ruthie and reading to her when Ruthie was starting to feel better but Mommy wasn't... You name it, she did it. Thank you, nurse Anna, for all the little ways you showed us love today and took care of us.

While I was making them some food this afternoon Anna told me "Mommy, I was a nurse today, but you are a nurse everyday. Mommies are always nurses." So true, Anna. That is my joy and privilege as your Mommy.

The Projects

For Christmas presents this year I made "art-on-the-go" bags: Drawstring backpacks that contained a sketch pad and a felt pencil role.
I got the idea and the pattern for the felt pencil roles from Amanda Blake Soule's book "The Creative Family". I made 6 of these, all a bit different, one each for Anna and Josie and their 4 older cousins. Sorry Maia Sage and Ruthie, I didn't think you two were old enough yet.

So for those of you who were curious, now you know what all of my sewing was leading up to Christmas.

The sketch books for Anna and Josie, by the way, have cover art drawn by Mitch, he is the artist of the family, not me. Anna and Josie themselves did the front and back cover art for their cousins' books. Yes, they watched the making of the bags and participated in much of it, not knowing that any of it was for themselves. I love the innocence of childhood and their joy in making and giving gifts to their cousins without a thought for themselves.

I hope you all enjoy using your art bags as much as we loved making them for you, Jack and Caroline, Maryn and Landry! We love you!

Spontaneous Hugs and Kisses

Who can resist this cutie pie? Not Anna!

She's a great big sister. She likes to give little Ruthie lots of hugs and kisses.

It makes a Mama's heart glad.

And what was Josie doing? Playing in the mud that she and her friends had made. "Making soup," she told me. That's why Ruthie was in the wagon playing and not on the ground crawling around. She doesn't get the line between real and pretend yet and she really wanted to eat the soup that Josie was offering her.

I do believe Josie was loving every minute of it.

I Brought you some flowers, Mommy

Little girls are so sweet, even when their Mommies aren't. We've been having a rough day around here. I wouldn't say that I've exactly been acting like a mature adult. It seems more like there are 4 little girls around here today, just one of them can produce milk for the baby to drink and is strong enough to push the stroller. Ruthie is the only one taking naps today, don't ask me why. I feel like I've had girls crying more today than they haven't been crying. I guess some days are just like that. Even in Australia.
But then Anna just came in from outside, where she and Josie are finally playing happily together in the water in the birdbath, and brought me these:


Thank you, Anna. You are a kindhearted little girl. You bring sunshine and beauty into every one's life that you touch. I am a lucky Mama.

Father's Day

We had a wonderful Father's Day celebrating Mitch. Thanks, Mitch, for being such an amazing Father to our three girls.
I hope your Father's Day was as blessed as ours, a day dedicated to showing the Fathers in your life how much you love them and value them in as many ways possible. We had a full but relaxing day filled with all the things Mitch loves most:


-6 a.m. bike ride up to the top of Flagstaff Mt. by Mitch


-Sprinkler time for two girls and their Dad.


-Time spent in the garden both as a family and Mitch by himself so he could actually work in peace. Can you think of anything Mitch would rather do with a day?


-Red wine and dark chocolate while the girls napped (does that count as a real date?!):

-A nap for Daddy'O! Now that's what I call one relaxing day:



-fresh blueberries for a snack:

-A 'potluck' for dinner (the words potluck and picnic are interchangeable in our house these days). Mitch said he wanted beans or lentils for dinner, so I made Huevos Rancheros. You can't beat freshly harvested lettuce, green onions and cilantro topping it all off! And a family picture to boot:



-Tandem triking (did you know such a thing existed?):


-And cheesecake topped with fresh strawberries for dessert shared with all our neighborhood friends that were outside playing with us in the evening:


-But the best surprise of all was what Anna and Josie wanted to give Daddy as a present for Father's Day: a Didgeridoo. He can actually get sound out of the thing! He has yet to master circular breathing which would allow you to play continually, but that will come with practice. If you've never heard an actual Didgeridoo played, now you can! But note that it was just received today and future videos of Didgeridoo playing will have many more hours of practice behind them:


Happy Father's Day, Mitch. We love you.

Beautiful Heart

I truly believe that it is the way of Jesus, the way of the cross, the way of the suffering servant, the way of meekness and humility, of giving and sharing, the way of love that wins out in the end. It is by dying that Christ won victory over death. But so often as we live life I look around me and it feels like the people who are winning are those in power, those wielding force and those driven by greed. But winning what? Today Anna reminded me that the way of Christ is the way of life, the way of experiencing this life to the fullest. We were at a birthday party this afternoon where they had a pinata full of little toys and games. After all the trinkets came crashing down there was, of course, the resulting melee of kids wrestling for a place on the floor, pushing, grabbing, all trying to fill their own bag with as much stuff as possible, all very normal behaviour for kids their age. Anna stood back and watched all this for a minute. You could see the dilemma in her head. She didn't want to dive into the fray. Pushing and shoving didn't seem worth it to this non aggressive little girl to get some 'stuff' But she did want some of whatever it was that had fallen all over the floor just like the rest. She went around to one side of the pile and was able to collect three little toys before the whole squabble was over and all the items were inside one child or another's little bag. Then she came running back to me to show me what she had found, dumping her prizes on the floor. Two of her friends also came over and dumped theirs onto the floor. They each had quite a pile. You could see that Anna was sad as she eyed their piles, wishing she had as much stuff as they did, interested in what it all was. We looked at each of her three things and I showed her what they were for, and then she jumped up with one of them in her hands and went running over to give it to her sister. Josie didn't have any herself. She had just gotten to the party late and was still waking up from her nap sitting on Mitch's lap having a snack. Anna's first thought was for her sister. Even though she didn't have much she wanted to share what she had to make her sister happy. I was in awe of my little girl and her desire to do something that is hard even for adults to do. It was so beautiful to watch.
When we were talking later about the party I complimented Anna on sharing what she had with her sister and she told me "Yeah, it made Josie happy when I shared with her, it made Josie happy." She was completely focused on her sister's happiness. At the end of the day that truly is what it comes down to. It was making her sister happy that made Anna happy. Not more stuff. Isn't it that the kind of happiness that we are all seeking? We think more stuff will make us happy, but actually giving away what we already have to someone who has less than we do is what brings happiness. Thank you, Anna, for reminding me of that today. Thank you for showing me your beautiful heart. My response in the situation was to be frustrated at the other parents that never asked their children to share with the other kids in the room who either didn't have any toys or who had fewer than they had (there were others who were left out of the fray). I was feeling like my daughter was losing because she was being gentle and kind. But she was showing me that she was winning something of far more value and being true to what really makes the world go 'round. Thank you for following your heart, Anna.

Some Thoughts on Love and Raising Children

Some years back I read the book "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. Contrary to my expectations (what could a book with a pink cover adorned with a doily and flowery writing have to offer me?) I was quite impacted by the concepts in the book. The author talks about how there are five different ways in which people express and receive love and the importance of communicating love to a person in their primary love language, in the way in which they best give and receive it. With kids it can be hard to know what their primary love language is, and it is important to express love to them in all 5 love languages. Lately I have been thinking a lot about what it means for me to love my girls in all 5 of these ways. Here are some of my thoughts. You don't have to read it all if it's too long for your busy day, but it is good for me to write it and think about it:)

Quality Time: As a stay-at-home mom it could be easy for me to just check this one off the list. "I spend all my time with my girls, I can't give them more time than I do, I'm good at this one!" But I think that quality time for Anna and Josie and Ruthie is time that I spend completely focused on them without other mommy distractions. Quality is especially time with each of them one-on-one without their sisters taking any of my attention away from the one that I am focusing on. That, my friends, is hard to do. This week there were a few days when Anna didn't take a nap. Sometimes that is hard for me because getting them all down for a nap at the same time is one of my highlights. I actually get some time for me! But the time that I was able to spend with Anna was precious time. We played Go Fish and a few other just mommy and Anna things and we both loved it. I find I have to be very intentional and creative and it takes a lot of energy for me to find the space in our lives to spend time with just one daughter at a time.

Acts of service is another way of expressing love that seems at first glance to be easy for me. I feel like I am serving my girls all the time. Serving them feels like all I do sometimes. But then I realized that for me there is a difference between acts of service that are just my daily responsibilities and acts of service that are extra ways that I put in extra effort to serve them. In our house there are things that are Anna and Josie's responsibility to do and things that are my responsibility to do. When I need them to do something that is their responsibility to do I tell them to do it, I don't ask them to do it. Anna is responsible for getting herself dressed every morning. When it is time for her to get dressed I tell her that. I don't just ask her to. There are things, like changing diapers, that are my responsibility to do as a mom. Sometimes when I am changing Ruthie's diaper I ask Anna or Josie if they want to do me a favor by bringing me the diaper. They usually love to help out in little ways like that. But it is always something I ask them to do and they have the option of saying no to the request because it is something that is completely and totally my responsibility to do. When they do choose to help me out with something that is my responsibility to take care of then they are serving me, then they are showing me love and I try and express to them that I really appreciate what they are doing. I want them to know how it feels to show love like that, how right they feel inside when they serve. When they obey me and take care of something that is their responsibility to take care of, that is great but it is not an act of service. When I make lunch for the girls I am doing something that is my responsibility to do, it is not an act of service in a going above and beyond the call of duty sort of way that they will receive as love. It is an expectation in our daily life although done with a lot of love on my part. When they are doing something that is their responsibility to do, like getting themselves dressed, and they ask me for help, I can choose to help them or I can choose not to. When I choose to help them in those duties that they know are their responsibility to do then that feels like I am truly serving them and I can see in how they respond to me doing those acts of service that they do feel loved and nurtured by that.

Physical touch is a way of expressing love that seems extremely important to young children, especially babies who don't have a separate identity from their mothers yet. In our household with three girls aged three and under there are constantly needs that need to be met from the moment the first one wakes up in the morning until the last one is finally asleep at night. Despite this pressure to do, do, do, I find that making sure I take the time to sit with each of the older girls each morning (one at a time) until they decide they have had enough snuggle time and climb out of my lap on their own goes a long way towards meeting their need for physical love each day. If I rush that time and try to move them on before they are ready to move on (breakfast has to be made, laundry needs to get started, I want a shower before Mitch walks out the door...) I find I pay for it later with little girls who are fussier and clingier than usual and just want to be up all day, their way of making sure their need to be close to me is met. I have also found that my baby carriers are invaluable. They are one item on the endless list of 'stuff you supposedly need to buy for your baby' that does actually seem important to me. They truly help me to be a better mother. I love my Ergo backpack for that reason, I can carry any one of our three girls on my back or front and still go about my day getting the endless list of chores done that makes our household function. It allows mothering and the domestic arts to go hand in hand. Wearing my girls (hopefully one at a time) allows my girls to feel loved even when I feel overwhelmed by all the stressors of life and don't feel like I can just stop and hold the one that needs to be held. Wearing Ruthie allows me to hold her and be responsive to her needs even as I keep moving to meet the needs of the older two and do all the tasks in my day that require two hands (laundry, chopping veggies for dinner, changing Josie's diaper...) Another thing that feels like it helps meet their need to be close to me is cosleeping. I love our big family bed! We have a queen size bed and a twin size bed right next to each other in our room that we all sleep on. Our room is basically one big bed:) It feels like this is what allows Mitch and me to continue parenting our girls in the way that we want to (responding to them when they need us, letting them be physically close to us when they need to...) even at night and still get the sleep we need. When they wake up at night they can roll over and feel our warm, sleeping bodies right next to them and they can go right back to sleep feeling safe, secure and loved even at night. (For tips on safe bedsharing check out: http://www.mothering.com/articles/new_baby/sleep/family-bed-safety.html )

Verbal affirmation, telling them I love them, is something it is easy for me to forget. Of course I love them! But I find that it is so easy for a day to slip by without telling them so. Coming from a 'Deeds, not Words' family where the emphasis was more on showing love means it is especially easy for me to forget how important it is for Anna and Josie and Ruthie to hear me say "I love you." But every time I tell them and see their responsive grin and how they cuddle up to me I am reminded that they do care. They do need to hear it. It does contribute to their feeling of well-being, to their physical, emotional and spiritual health.

Gifts are hard in our family because neither Mitch nor I are good gift givers. More 'stuff ' is not a very high value of ours nor do we have much money to spend on gifts or often have the time, hands and money it takes to make gifts. But it is another way in which our girls receive our love. So the little bit of time we do find to devote to making gifts is usually spent on making gifts for our girls, sorry to all of you who haven't received a gift from us in the last number of years:). I think that kids are natural gift givers. Our girls love to tell me who each of their creations are for and sometimes I am able to get those creations to their intended recipients.

It feels like all of these things are pieces of what contribute to our girls feeling a sense of rightness inside themselves, a sense of security, a foundation with which to approach the world, a confidence in themselves and joy in the world around them. I love the smiles on their faces when they feel these things inside themselves. I love seeing them share that love with each other and with others around them, modeling how they see us loving them. It is good for me to remind myself of what I am trying to do, of how I want to love them each day in the ways that Mitch and I have chosen to parent our girls.